fairy tales don't exist in the long run :(

i must have thought i was swimming in the pool of heaven

i must have smiled beyond the capacity of denial

i must have dreamed about getting engaged with the most impossibility figure that ive been waiting for long time

i must have felt that it was true until the time knock on me

i must have realized that it didn't look real

how long must i stay in this state of uncertainty

must i give up on the sacrifice ive made?

should i regain my consciousness, so i could wake up and get hurt?

S.I.G.H

I don't want to give you up

I don't want to hold you up

I don't want ambiguous

I just know that I've had enough

I want you to travel with me

Let loose and let your mind go free...Show you things that you've never seen

You just got to go with me ...

Your love is so good that I want to show you

Don't make me responsible, for something that you can't find ...

Your loving is so good, so good, the closer

I want it, I want it

Into me

I want it, I want it,

Leave it here

I want to get close to you baby

Experience...

I want it, I want it

Generous...

Lay down what's impeding you

Cause I want to get close to you

I don't want to give you up

I'm tired of the pull and push

I"m tired of the making love

Don't you feel like you've had enough

I want you to journey with me, explore all the innocence

I don't mind us to build tension but we've got to move in the same direction

definitely in love with 'fine' by Tiago Lorc

He's never been lonely

She takes his hand and all his troubles step aside

He's never felt like this before,

But he'd like to try

'Let Yourself in', it's all he's thinking about

'Let Yourself in', now he's singing out loud

I'm feeling like my life has just begun

And I'm feeling fine

I fell so alive, singin'

I'm feeling like my life has just begun

And I'm feeling fine

So fine, fine, fine

She lightens up his morning

All of his plans seem so damn easy to decide

It's not about just feeling lonely

It's more, just give it a try

'Let Yourself in', it's all he's thinking about

'Let Yourself in', now he's singing out loud

I'm feeling like my life has just begun

And I'm feeling fine

I fell so alive, singin'

I'm feeling like my life has just begun

And I'm feeling fine

So fine, fine, fine

I can't wait to find my way home

I can't wait to get to start

It will not be done, until it's all begun

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AqTj4ajvZAA

am i doing just fine?

i hate to be in the edge of darkness

i want to stay in my own comfort zone

where i feel just to be myself, satisfied, and comfortable

neither too much nor too less

lately ive been questioning myself

is this what i want to believe in?

is this what i want myself to endure?

is this what i see myself to become a person whom i dislike?

i always try to point out good judgements,

but i cant imply it to myself

ever once a while in my life, i'm very disappointed

seeing indecisive part of me that never try to look up for herself

sigh

LIFE

infatuated,

literally nowadays' situation cant be described in a just simple way

until it makes me realize

i just want to stand there

and dream on until i am left with no options

why do we always have conflict?

it would just end with restless heart,raging fury inside an empty box

when i try to put back the pieces,

it results the opposite

shouldn't it be to resolve the complicated puzzle?

or should it be just a sea of troubles with no answers

what i am about to do,

just let the time come to senses and peaceful mind..

macaroon madness

nothing tastes as good as macaroon from paris, Laduree

i'm not a dessert type of person

last month, my sister gave me a piece of macaroon to try because

she thought that i would consider it as one of my favorite out of tons other delicious dessert in the world

well, she was right and i was absolutely in love with chocolate macaroon.

it was in the right amount, neither too small or too big in a portion.

it wasn't too sweet, it was soft and chewy.

how the world could create such appetizing small little pieces from heaven.

every time i dream about macaroon, i feel like i am dying to go for one and surfing around for every website which is located to be the best macaroon place nearest to my home, Boston city.

so ive been doing some research for some good macaroons in NYC.

there are some-lists that i put down if you are macaroon lover like me

1. Bouchon bakery (just okay, too sweet for the choco)

10 Columbus Circle
New York, NY 10019

(212) 823-9366

2. J chan (a new place recommended by kathy and windy, NYUM TO NUTELLA)

161 W 36th St

New York, NY 10018

(646)573-5048

3.Bouley Market

120 W Broadway
(between Duane St & Reade St)
New York, NY 10013

(212) 608-5829

4.almondine bakery

85 Water St
(between Main St & Washington St)
Brooklyn, NY 11201

(718) 797-5026

5.tisserie bakery

66 Park Avenue
New York, NY 10016-3007
(212) 885-7111

6.madelainne pasterie

132 W 23rd St

New York, NY 10011

(212) 243-275

7.la maison du chocolate

30 Rockefeller Plz

New York, NY 10112

(212) 265-9404

8.macaroon nyc cafe

161 W 36th St

New York, NY 10018

(646) 573-5048

9. joyce bakery

646 Vanderbilt Ave
(between Park Pl & Prospect Pl)
Brooklyn, NY 11238

(718) 623-7470

10. cha-an

230 E. 9th St

2nd Fl
New York, NY 10079

(212) 228-8030

11. financier patisserie

62 Stone St
(between Hanover Sq & Mill Ln)
New York, NY 10004

(212) 344-5600

i cant wait for boxes of macaroon delivered by my good friend from sanfransisco

the brand of famous macaroon: paulette. heard to be the best in town of SF.

and it tastes almost similar like laduree =)

http://www.paulettemacarons.com/

être en amour fait mal un peu,Je suis heureux que je trouve finalement vous

1.life is created to explore, to share and to love

it might feel extraordinary and it might turn you down

without being experimental, life is not like what they call about

2.it is taking ages to take courages to learn,to forgive and to take good side of everything

once you fall , you have to get ready to keep up on yourself

dont ever be afraid, because you have to always look up and be brave..

3. life wont go smoothly like a roll on

you wont expect like the way you think it should have been done

think straight, have faith and do good

believe that tomorrow will always be better and yesterday is already gone

mumbling in the morning, trying to concentrate and feeling sleepy o_0

mellow yellow

Tears in my eyes

Dropping one by one

How I can't believe I've to go through uncomfortable state

Hell yea

I'm falling down slowly,

Wishing everything will go back to the way it is supposed to be

You..

Why do you love to stick with me

What i'm trying to say is

I wish i could just forget and pass my days without you

You've turned my life so blue

In the pouring rain,

I want to enjoy my time

Feeling released without having to worry about you..

All i'm saying,

At these moment,

I can only think about is to be free

To find recovery

To find myself to the place where i belong..

Healing

Resting

Thats surely what i need it right now

*sick and tired

AbCdEfGhIjKLmNopQrStuVwxYz

1. i feel like saying non sense just to make me happy *DROOLIN 0_O

2. im hyper

3. PMS attack, dont try to get near me..im here to bite you

4. ate too much in a day but glad that i drank a zip of green tea to reduce all the fatness

5. im in love but i'm lazy as u can see me blogging at this minute

6. i miss mama

7. i want summer NOW

8. papers are all around my bed plus my two projects are supposed due today but it got extended until tomorrow and the other one on monday..but still,

PROCRASTINATION IS HERE YO!!!

9. what am i doing now? printing "some stolen cheats" that i took when the teacher was away from the classroom

10. listening to andrew garcia cover of straight up when he made to the second audition in american idol

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jbgWSF65aE0&feature=sub

he's in the top 24. im supporting him with all my heart

11. hopefully, i get my summer internship here in united states. done with the job resume, and will be discussing about where to apply with career services tomorrow at 2. please God, lead me the way

12. not in the mood of uploading pictures

• 12. ok GOODNITE EVERYONE :)

QUESTIONNAIRES

What is your favorite song of all time?

untitled - maliq

What are your "comfy clothes"?

large white tshirt and short pant

If you were on Extreme Makeover: Home Edition; what kind of room would you ask for?

a simple comfy room

Whats the First Thing You Notice In A Boy/Girl?

Their smiles

What language would you like to speak fluently?

french, it is sexy

Are you in love?

i dont think im in love but im falling for someone..*cheesy

How many kids (or any at all) would you want to have?

2 :) and twins

Favorite hot drink?

hot dark choco

Performing Arts, Fine Arts, or Sports?

Sport:basketball

Riding horses or riding dolphins?

riding horses, feels so free and super cool

Do you believe a good life is attainable? or is it something that is out of our control ie subject to luck etc.

absolutely attainable

How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?

dont kill the trees

do you plan in advance

yes i do sometimes.. its more organized

What attracts you most?

how they bring themselves in public, how they smile, how they respect others, how they dress

Do you hold hands when you walk in public?

when i feel like it

Close your eyes for a moment, who pops into your head?

no one

Do you say "I love you" in the relationship?

Yes. when i feel that is the right time to say it

Describe your perfect Sunday morning?

waking up next to someone you wish to have around, cooking and listening to relaxing songs all day..

If you could be successful at any job in the world, what would that job be?

a famous photographer/chef/singer

What makes you cry?

remembering unforgettable memories that cant happen anymore.

What makes you laugh?

bestfriends and you

If you won the lottery, how would you spend your millions?

goin to japan, travel around with mommie and save some

If you could time travel to the past to correct any mistakes you feel youve made would you?

hmm apa ya, cant think of one right now

What do you do for fun?

singing?

Do you own any pets, and if so what do you have?

at this point of time, no..i want some hamsters

Do you have any tattoos, and if so what and where?

plan to get one..but im such a loser

Water or 100% Juice?

wataaaa*

Opera, Musical, Concert, Play, Performance, or Other?

performance

What is your favorite clothing brand?

at the moment, urbanoutfitters

Most embarrassing moment?

Too many to tell

Where is Waldo?

in his crib i guess

What was your last thought?

shud i sleep now?

Juice and crackers or milk and cookies?

milk and cookies..

Which is worse? A bad laugh or a bad cough?

do u really have to ask?

Would you rather be blind or deaf?

blind

Define yourself in 3 words...

FUN,BORING, COOL

Do you eat cold cereal at night?

if im hungry, i would just open my fridge take out some milk and have "yg gambar macan apa yah yg biru"

What is your favorite TV show?

tv series..HAHA

Kill the spider or let it out?

KILL..

Do you shower every single day?

yessss.dooh

Walking past a beggar, spare change or ignore?

share some love

Boat or bus?

bus

Where do you want to travel next?

PARIS, japan, THAILAND

What would you do if Michael Jackson asked you out

surely saying YEAAA.WOHOO.

Do you read harry potter books?

NAH, i dislike reading

What is your favorite place?

anywhere in BALI

If you could have one super human power what would you choose?

reading ppls mind

Have you had a beer in the last week?

no, i drank sweet wines

Flip flops or sandles?

I'm a flipper

What do you do on fridays?

sleeping,hangin out or korean-marathon.

How tall are you?

im short -_-

I'm in love with the notes from larissa tmblr..so sweet

tired,exhausted,happy,bored,lazy

my current mood:

TIRED

laying down ,

my stomach is craving for some energy

my eyes are dozed even i slept for the whole 2 hours 30 minutes

after a long long exhausted day of studying from the morning.

okay, i can do it..

its one more day away from being tortured,

then here it goes again my weekend

actually i'm just blurbing all the words,

i have to stop procrastinating

i have all my works waiting to be done.

can actually someone do it for me?

so it will be the greatest gift ever..

l a s t w e e k e n d:

• i hate saying goodbyes, last week i had to say it again to my dearest friend who i met in boston 2 years ago. His name is Rendhika. i remember so much fun when i used to have him around as my "curhat" mate, my 3 dimensi mate, my private driver and a good friend of mine. i'll see you mr, in may probably?Good luck with the destination you are meant to go for back in our home.
• when life seems so thoughtful and always brings you a lesson.. you cant trust someone as if you've known them forever. you might get really connect to them and at the same time they are the ones who hurt u utmost. you must trust your feelings and your closest at first before you let somebody else mess up with yours. life can be cruel, but remember we are the controller. so either you gain or your loss. it is all within you.
• catching up with all the stories that cici elsa have updated me. hanging out with rani and elsa at the same time reminds me like old times.despite the hectic schedule everyone has,at least there's always be one time that we make it work to just spend a moment and appreciate it.
• the sudden trip to NYC. first plan, i was totally excited to have a chance to be with ka elsa. but she was pretty busy and even couldn't miss a minute to spare her time with me. she promised me, she'll visit me sometime around june or august. well well, i hope she wont dissapoint me this time. beside, i met my cousin with all her craziness and her kepo *just kidding. met a new friend, kathy that soon to be mr. tatuhas's girlfriend..haha evil smile
• at last, had the quality time with inchas walking around nyc in the cold weather. thanks to fahmy k and emma for introducing me to belgian waffle, its delicioso.
• pleasing time too with mrs. setiadi after all these times, too hard to make up time with her.
• one recommendation: shuld try prosciutto rissoto at spring cafe.
• see you guys in two weeks.